Anuj Peter is a 30 year-old gay man and a Program Officer for Blue Diamond Society, a LGBTI organisation. One of the main pressures on young men and women in Nepal, he says, is for them to get married. Anuj was not immune to this pressure: “To show me as a perfect man I decided to get married with a lady.” Many gay men get married he says. Fortunately, he says, he didn’t make that mistake: “When I get engaged with her, we decided for pre-honeymoon. We went to for the one night and at that time I feel that that was the worst night of my life. When I start kissing her I feel that this is not the person what I supposed to do because that I already that the fun with the boys. And I compare how I feel with the boys and how I feel with the girls because that was the first time I was kissing some girls in the relationship with. So I think if I cannot spend 10 minutes with her in a one room, how can I spend my whole life in that room.” He pulled out of the engagement: “This is not my right to make her life destroy,” he says. He wishes though that LGBT couples had the same rights as straight couples: “sometime you feel alone and wish that Nepal will legalize marriage equality.” Ultimately he just wants the same rights as everyone else. His message to fellow Nepali LGBT community members is this: “Fight for yourself and fight for your community and the family will accept you. Because there is the love and the connection with the Nepali family.” Nepal's current LGBTQI+ laws are some of the most open in the world – including the legal recognition of a third gender. Tangible implementation of the various government orders has been piecemeal though, a 2014 United Nations report noted. And government officials have continued to harass LGBT groups, including by alleging that organizing around homosexuality is illegal in the country. Furthermore, while laws are progressive, discrimination is wide spread, especially within families, where marriage between a man and a woman and the bearing of children are expected of young Nepalese. Kathmandu, Nepal. 06.11.18. Photo Robin Hammond/Witness Change

Anuj Peter /

“I was quite feminine at my childhood. So people use to say so many derogative words like Chakka Hijra. But I am lucky that my father and mother were teacher at my own school. So I did get that word many time. So my school life is not bad as other LGBTI member. But when my life change, when we shift to KTM with my brother and Sister. I have to by a parents them to my life didn’t get chance to that more about me. After that they went out of Nepal. I they about me. And family myself what kind of person I am. Because I was different than other boys I met.

And at childhood I saw other transgender at TV and afraid to be like them. Till then I didn’t want to be like them. Till then I didn’t know about LGBTI. I start think about it. Talking about that time, so many LGBTI people use fake id and I did that. Using that id, so I did that. Using that id so I did that. Using that id I find two of the best gay friend. We used to go club unofficial gay club, where I find one of the members of BDS and representative to visit BDS. I went their with my friend but its’ really scary to inter there but they really think it in my negative way. But we should be their for ourselves. After that I start converting with BDS. And fill what I am.

Another part of my life: every people start talking my so I decided to do that at that this so many gay for did that and say my they are happy to believe it. So I try to do that. But when it comes to reality it was really different. At that time I scared that marriage is not only about the sum of being husband and wife to society. Another part is physical and emotional attachment as well. So I think to quit that relationship. And on that time I told what I what my sexuality to my brother and sister. They request me to say it yourself to her and live her who you want to me are ok with your sexuality.

Another side I already start work with BDS. On that time I know were about myself and my community. SoI decided to work with my community But the challenge was I was not out to society what I am. During that time I got offered from one national media to tell my story and come out to help so I decided to that show and come out because at that same year 2015 earthquake occurred at the country and Think that my relative would not see my interview. But as I said early what I think I happened. So everybody saw that interview and start calling my and start calling my parents about it. My parents were ok with it but they request not to be come were like this in media, we accept what you are but this stay with the family only. Then I start thing of doing my community. And which I thing many gay guys are still hide his sexuality and their relationship. So I start work about marriage equality. Now I work on the issues to the country.”

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