zAINAB / Egypt
“It took me a long time to understand what is the meaning of these feelings. Growing up in a small town I never heard about lesbians or homosexuals, so I assumed I think girls are attractive because I am young and that it will go away as I get older. But it didn’t. When I turned 20 I understood something about me is different, so I started reading about it. I learned it is called “lesbian” and that there a lot of women like me all around the world. But I also learned that being gay in Egypt is illegal and even dangerous.
Once I asked my family what do they think about gay people, and their answers were a mix of disgust and HATRED, explaining that being gay is a disease and that they feel sorry for parents who need to deal with gay children. But they didn’t know I was talking about myself. They made me feel ashamed and hate myself just for being who I am.
I recently started dating a man in order to look normal, and I hate it. But I have no choice.
I hope one day I could feel comfortable with myself, and even live with a women. HOPEFULLY it will be soon.”
