He / Indonesia
“HI, for anyone who read this text, you’re so lucky, you are life in right place than me.
I’m so sorry for my bad English, you can correct it.
I’M from INDONESIA, the country that very tolerant about religion but not about my IDENTITY. I’m 17 years old. Actually I’m very love with this country, PEOPLE, nature, climate. But sometimes if I getting BULLIED, I just want to GO away from THis fuckn COUNTRY. 2017 my family know about my IDENTIty, you know my parents react of course, raised by Moslem family MAKES my family disagree about Me being GAY. My mom tell me to get GIRLFRIEND for hide my IDENTITY. Yeah, I do that today, I have a girlfriend even I don’t love his. Bully also COME from my older SISTER, she always throw word that hurts me, she always said ‘FAGOt’ to his little brother for no reason why. Can YOU feel that? :( social life can receive me and my family do that. So where should I GO?. I’m also get bully IN school, girls in my class always thought I’m a girl, but I’m not looks like girl, I’m normally LOOKs like normal BOY. I just dreaming place THAT I can show my IDENTIty in PEACEFULLY. Without being BULLIED. After all of this happens to ME, I’m just a LONER, I like SPEND my time in QUITe COld place, maybe forest, lake, i just want to go FROm they. They hwo bullied me because im DIFFERENT.”
You seem like a strong person. Please continue to be so. I know it is hard and discouraging. I’m a 64 year old man living in the United States. When people find out I live here, they think it’s a gay paradise. Unfortunately that’s not true (although it is far better than many other places in the world) and it certainly wasn’t true when I was growing up. Like you I was bullied. Like you I didn’t find acceptance with friends or family. In fact, I didn’t come out of the closet until I was 43 so I lived with what I saw as a shameful secret for a very long time. Some of that was my own choice, some of it the situation. Today I don’t have to fear being arrested but there is still the possibility of physical attacks, and in many places in this country I could be denied housing, or a job, or other rights because of my sexuality. Our civil rights are constantly under attack. So we continually fight for change and a better world.
I’ve had a chance to chat online with a few guys in Indonesia. Their stories are similar to yours. One is a Christian and he feels unsafe because of his religion and his sexuality. Most are Muslim. I tell them to be patient. Things can change. They changed here. Opportunities may present themselves for life elsewhere. Like you they love their country but it may be necessary to love it from afar in order to live and simply be who you are. I hope the best for you.
hai, he(?) maaf kalau aku salah sebut nama, tapi i just want to tell you that even if the whole country is against you, just know that, this indonesian is rooting for you, gay itu ga salah, gay itu bukan sebuah tindakan kriminal, walau kamu gay, tunjukan bahwa dirimu bisa menjadi anak bangsa yang lebih berguna daripada yang lurus tapi hanya bisa mencibir.
Lots of love, xoxo!